What it is
Also called the mental load or invisible labor. It’s the thinking part of running a home, separate from doing the chores: noticing the milk is low, remembering the dentist appointment, planning the week, deciding who does what.
Researchers have measured it task by task, asking families who does the planning and who does the execution. In studies of American mothers, most felt solely responsible for organizing the family’s schedules, even when they worked outside the home, and carrying sole responsibility for the kids’ well-being was linked to feeling empty and less satisfied with life and partnership.
How it shows up for me
Naming it changed how I look at “helping out.” Doing a chore you were asked to do is execution. Noticing it needed doing, before anyone asked, is the other half of the work. I try to own whole tasks, from noticing to done.