Field Guide
A pocket dictionary for modern life. Short, plain, no essay required.
En españolNothing matches that yet.
- ConceptThe 50/30/20 ruleA simple budget: half of take-home pay for needs, 30% for wants, 20% for savings and extra debt payments.
- ConceptAbsorb and optimizeQuietly taking on the cost of a problem and engineering around it, instead of telling the person causing it.
- ConceptAbstractionLeaving out the details on purpose is what lets an idea work in many places at once.
- ConceptAccepting uncertaintyEven with every fact, some things can't be known for sure. Plan for that instead of pretending.
- ConceptAccountability systemsWays of keeping your commitments visible against what actually happens, for the days motivation doesn't show up.
- ConceptAccountability without authorityBeing held to an outcome without the power to assign the people or the scope it needs.
- ValueActionThinking about it is not the same as doing it.
- ConceptAdverse childhood experiencesA count of hard things that happened before eighteen. A count of events, not a diagnosis.
- ConceptAffordable lossAsk "what am I willing to lose?" before "how much can I make?"
- ConceptAgency and communionTwo basic ways of being human: standing out as yourself, and belonging to something bigger.
- ConceptAggregation theoryWhy the internet keeps producing a few giant platforms that own the customer and squeeze everyone else.
- ConceptThe AI effectOnce a machine can do something, we stop calling it intelligence.
- ConceptAI sycophancyA language model's habit of agreeing with you at the expense of the truth.
- ConceptAI-associated psychosisWhen long chatbot conversations seem to reinforce unusual beliefs. What is known, what is not, and when to get help.
- ConceptAI-generated vs. AI-assistedAI-generated produces something generic. AI-assisted is a person using tools to build something specific.
- ConceptAmor fatiLove of fate: treating everything that happened, the loss included, as part of the life you would choose.
- ConceptThe anchorSomething in your life heavy enough to pull you out of the feed and into the present.
- ConceptAnger as signalAnger is information before it is a strategy. It usually points at a boundary, a threat, or a value under pressure.
- ConceptAnthropomorphismGiving human feelings and intentions to something that is not human, like a pet, a storm or a chatbot.
- ConceptAnti-libraryThe books you have not read yet are the most useful part of your library.
- ConceptAnticipatory griefGrief that arrives before the loss does.
- ConceptAtomic task ownershipGive people whole, specific jobs, not vague categories like "help out" or "anything else."
- ConceptAttachment bankingSmall, regular deposits of undivided attention that keep the bigger conflicts from happening.
- ConceptAttachment theoryThe bonds we form with early caregivers shape how we connect, trust and calm down as adults.
- ConceptAttachment, the clinging kindHolding on to an outcome as if your well-being depends on getting it.
- ValueAutonomyThe freedom I want for myself, I owe to everyone else.
- ConceptBaby-led weaningLetting a baby feed themselves soft pieces of the family meal, instead of only spoon-fed purées.
- ConceptBe the floorWhen something rolls downhill at you, take it, and do not pass it to the person below you.
- ConceptBeautiful chaosMeeting the mess of life with presence instead of trying to manage it out of existence.
- ConceptBelonging vs. performanceBeing accepted for what you produce is not the same as being known for who you are.
- ConceptBids for connectionThe small ways people reach for you. Receiving them matters more than grading how they were made.
- ConceptBlack-box deployment riskThe AI harm we can already see: opaque systems making consequential decisions faster than we can understand them.
- ConceptBoundary conflationMixing up the limit you set with the force you use to deliver it.
- ConceptBreathe, move, actA two-step way out of paralysis: breathe until you are back in your senses, then take one physical step.
- ConceptBreathingSlowing your breath on purpose, to calm down and put your attention on one thing.
- ConceptThe calibration pendulumSwinging between too much and too little while you learn. The work is a smaller swing, not no swing.
- ConceptCaptureWhen a useful system gets turned toward someone else's benefit, and the people using it blame themselves for the cost.
- ConceptCivil forfeitureA court case against your property, not you. No conviction required.
- ConceptClaim groundsBefore you argue about a claim, decide what kind of claim it is: something you lived, something a source supports, or something true inside a story.
- ConceptClassical conditioningLearning by pairing: after enough repeats, a neutral signal sets off a response on its own.
- ConceptClean griefSadness without drama, confusion or fantasy. The pain, named accurately.
- ConceptClear signalsAmbiguity is expensive. Ask for clean, clear signals, and give them.
- ConceptCo-regulationTwo nervous systems steadying each other. It's how kids learn to calm down at all.
- ConceptCognitive bypassA story or frame that slips past your defenses so you can see something true about yourself.
- ConceptCognitive defusionSeeing a thought as a thought, not as a fact you have to obey.
- ConceptCognitive household laborThe invisible thinking work of running a home: planning, remembering, anticipating and handing out tasks.
- ValueCollaborationI'm used to carrying things alone. This is the muscle I'm still building.
- ValueCommunicationMost problems are communication problems wearing a costume.
- ConceptCommunication mode synchronizationSometimes communication fails not because of what you said, but because of the speed and mode you said it in.
- ConceptCompany cultureCulture is the product of decisions that worked. It lets a company scale, and later it can become a straitjacket.
- ConceptCompensation vs. choiceThe difference between a behavior you built to survive and one you pick freely now.
- ConceptCompetitive authoritarianismA regime with real elections where the people in power tilt the field so far that it stops being a democracy.
- BeliefComplete honestyBeing completely candid is almost always the better path, even when it costs you.
- ConceptCompound learningSkills leak across domains. Drawing makes you better at guitar, and guitar makes you better at work.
- ConceptConcept creepWhen words for harm, like trauma or abuse, slowly stretch to cover more and milder things.
- ConceptConduct is what trickles downWhat really flows down from the top is not wealth. It is behavior.
- ConceptContemptThe judgment that someone is beneath you. It looks down, not across, and it stops asking questions.
- ConceptContingent self-worthThe areas of life where you believe you must succeed to be worth anything.
- BeliefCooking is loveFeeding people is one of the plainest ways to love them, and it brings them to the table.
- ConceptCorporate personhoodCompanies being treated as people under the law, from the boring kind to the constitutional kind.
- ConceptCorpus biasJournals over-record the examined half of a life. Joy at rest rarely gets written down.
- ConceptCovert depressionDepression in men that shows up as anger, overwork and distance instead of visible sadness.
- ConceptCreative amendmentsPeople reshape every explanation they hear. The good ones survive the reshaping and get stronger.
- ConceptCreative renunciationSome of the best work comes from getting out of the way, not from expressing yourself harder.
- ConceptCurating the animalWe are animals. The wisdom isn't escaping that, it's choosing which animal patterns to feed.
- ValueCuriosityCooking, code, kids, this site. It all started with "how does that work?"
- ConceptDeferred maintenance as a collapse signalNobody announces a decline. You notice it when the roads and bridges stop getting fixed.
- ConceptDembowThe two-bar drum loop under almost all reggaeton, named after a 1991 dancehall song.
- ConceptDesigned currents and natural currentsBefore you call something "just how things flow," ask whether someone dug the channel.
- ConceptDetrainingWhat happens to strength and muscle when you stop training, and why coming back is faster than starting.
- ConceptDigital sovereigntyYour writing, your mail and your name living on things you own, not on a platform that can take them away.
- BeliefDignity from birthEvery human being deserves dignity from the moment they are born. Real dignity, not the fake one.
- ConceptDiploma vs. toothbrushing problemsSome problems you solve once. Most you have to keep solving every day, and resenting that does not help.
- ConceptDiscernmentThe trained ability to notice fine differences: signal from noise, gold from fool's gold.
- ValueDisciplineShowing up for myself first, so there's enough of me to go around.
- ConceptDissociationA disconnect between things that are usually joined: self, surroundings, feelings, memory, body. Mostly ordinary, sometimes not.
- ConceptDistributed identityWho you are, socially, is partly built in other people's minds. Each person sees a different you.
- ConceptDo betterTwo words that used to feel like an attack and became a standard I chose for myself.
- ConceptDoctrine as costumeWearing a principle built for one purpose to justify taking something you already decided to take.
- ConceptDoing, not lecturingKids pick up what you do far more than what you tell them.
- ConceptDoor-closingAnswering a real reach with a true but empty reply that keeps the door shut.
- ConceptDual-trackingProcessing what you feel while also tracking what is landing on the other person, in real time.
- ValueEfficiencyMy superpower at a desk. A liability while brushing my daughter's hair.
- ConceptEfficiency or laziness?Efficiency removes steps that add no value. Laziness skips steps that do, until the bill arrives.
- ConceptThe ego as a toolYou don't fire the ego. You reassign it.
- ConceptEmbodied simulationsStories work because we live them from the inside, through someone else's eyes.
- ConceptEmergency fundMoney set aside for the unexpected, so one bad week does not turn into debt.
- ConceptEmotional intelligenceThe ability to notice, understand and manage emotions, your own and other people's.
- ConceptEmotional invalidationTelling someone, or leaving them feeling, that what they feel is wrong or unacceptable.
- ConceptEmpathy as armorEmpathy doesn't mean agreeing or excusing. It means not letting strangers hijack your brain.
- ConceptEmpathy, compassion and self-compassionUnderstanding what someone feels, acting to ease it, and doing the same for yourself.
- ConceptEnchildificationA culture that keeps grown adults childish, one game mechanic at a time.
- ConceptThe end-of-history illusionWe remember how much we changed in the last ten years, and still assume we are done changing.
- ConceptThe energy leakLosing your power by overexplaining, overanalyzing or saying more than the moment needs.
- ConceptEngagement optimizationDesigning a product to maximize time spent and return visits, usually because ad money follows attention.
- ConceptEntry costWhat it costs someone to tell you the truth. Lowering it is not going soft, it is getting better data.
- ConceptErosNot only sex: the old idea of a force that moves toward union, creation and beauty.
- BeliefThe ever-expanding universeInstead of a god, I believe in what I can see, touch and feel: the universe, a smile, the sun.
- ConceptEvidence-based journalingAgainst imposter syndrome: write down what you have actually done, named and specific, and read it back.
- ConceptExistential nihilismThe view that life has no built-in meaning or value. Where you go from there is the real question.
- ConceptExtraction modeListening hard, pulling the signal out, and handing back only the filtered version of yourself.
- ConceptEye contactLooking someone in the eyes is a way of honoring them, and of being willing to be seen.
- ConceptFailure of nerveWe usually miss the future not for lack of imagination, but because we are afraid to be wrong out loud.
- ConceptFalsifiabilityA claim worth testing says what would prove it wrong.
- BeliefFeedback is kingFeedback from people who know more than you, flattering or not, always levels up the work.
- ConceptFlowBeing so absorbed in what you are doing that time and self-consciousness fall away.
- ConceptFour layers of a news storyAny piece of journalism can be split into fact, context, framing and activation.
- ConceptFragmentation, not representationA system survives when every group explains its failure in a way that protects the group's self-image.
- ConceptGambler's fallacyBelieving that something is "due" because it has not happened in a while.
- ConceptGaslightingManipulating someone until they doubt their own perception of reality.
- ConceptGoodhart's lawWhen a measure becomes a target, it stops being a good measure.
- ValueGratitudeGratitude you can see: a thank-you out loud, a favor returned, showing up when it's your turn.
- ConceptHabits audit against valuesPick your values, then ask honestly whether your daily habits show them.
- ConceptHallucination, two meaningsDoctors and AI people use the same word for very different things.
- ConceptThe halo effectOne good impression spilling over into how you judge everything else about someone.
- ConceptHappinessNot pleasure, and not a place you get to stay. It comes in moments, and more of them come when I'm at peace and in line with myself.
- ConceptHard and soft limitsSome limits move with effort. Some never will. Knowing which is which saves you years.
- BeliefHard work polishes a personSustained effort changes the person doing it, even when the work itself fails.
- ConceptHead on a swivelIn public, stay aware of who is around you. No judgment, no theory, just presence.
- ConceptHealth extortionMy name for health insurance that is tied to whoever employs you.
- ConceptHigh signalInformation that is actually useful to you, compared with the noise around it. What counts depends on where you are.
- ValueHonestyTelling the truth, starting with the stories I tell myself.
- ConceptThe horse might talkA lot can happen in a year. Some of the best possibilities are the ones you cannot imagine yet.
- ConceptHousing FirstGive people a permanent home first, with no conditions, and then help with everything else.
- ConceptHuman qualityWhat a person is like in how they treat the weak and how they live when nobody is watching.
- ValueHumility and humorI might be the one who's wrong. Might as well be able to laugh about it.
- ConceptHumility as permeabilityStaying open enough that life can still teach you. Not smallness, not submission.
- ConceptHyper-independenceIndependence pushed past what is healthy: needing to handle everything alone and struggling to accept help.
- Concept"I deserve it"When rest has to be justified by what you produced first, the accounting is the problem, not the rest.
- ConceptI only know half of itAssume your insight is always incomplete. Life gets easier.
- BeliefI'm human and I'm going to make mistakesI'm human, and I'm going to make mistakes. And that's okay.
- BeliefI'm not special, but I'm consciousBeing aware of what you do is not the same as being better than anyone. It is a practice.
- BeliefIdeas are freeIdeas, frameworks and writing should be free. What you can fairly sell is a thing people use.
- ConceptIdeas come in motionThe best ideas tend to show up when the mind is busy with something light, not when it is straining.
- ValueImprovementOne percent a day doesn't look like much. Give it a year.
- ConceptInfinite regressAn explanation that only moves the problem one step back hasn't explained anything.
- ConceptInflation, the Jungian kindGetting so taken over by a big archetype, the hero or the savior, that you think you are it.
- ConceptInformation asymmetryWhen one side of a deal knows more than the other, and the price shows it.
- ConceptInnovation adoption thresholdPeople adopt something new only when it is clearly more useful and saves them time, energy or money.
- ConceptThe innovator's dilemmaSuccessful companies lose to newcomers by doing exactly what made them successful: serving their best customers.
- ConceptIntegrating instinctFeeling an instinct or emotion fully, without pushing it down and without obeying it.
- ConceptIntegration eventThe moment the pieces finally come together and you know what to do next.
- ConceptIntegration gapThe distance between understanding something about yourself and actually behaving differently.
- ValueIntegrityKeeping the gap small between what I say and what I do.
- ConceptIntelligence as heatIntelligence without empathy burns everything, even inward. The skill is choosing where to aim it.
- ConceptIntention, as a testOne question before a step: is this taking me closer to where I want to be, or further away?
- ConceptIntergenerational patternsFamilies pass down more than genes. Some of it is wound, some is gift. The work is choosing what continues.
- ValueIntimidadBeing near someone for real. My first value, and my hardest.
- ValueJoyGladness without a reason. I have a lot of it, like my children.
- ConceptJudgmentReaching a verdict. It rests on how well you see, and it can be clear or corrupt.
- ConceptKaiokenA short, ritual burst of maximum effort, borrowed from Goku, for the moment that really counts.
- ConceptKeep it simpleEvery extra assumption is another way to be wrong. Cut the ones that do not need to be there.
- ConceptKnowledge and informationData is facts, information is organized data, knowledge is what a person makes of it.
- ConceptKudaranaiJapanese for "trivial, worthless, doesn't matter." My shorthand for checking out and calling it calm.
- ConceptLabelingSwapping a description of what someone did for a label of who they are.
- ConceptThe landlordThe inner voice that charges suffering as rent before you are allowed to forgive yourself.
- ConceptThe lane ruleLet AI do the infrastructure. Write the sentences yourself.
- ConceptLead with confusionShare the question you are wrestling with, not just the conclusion you reached.
- ConceptLearning adds, the Way subtractsLearning gains something every day. Practice, in the Taoist sense, lets go of something every day.
- ConceptLet the cut flowA strike that nothing stops keeps its momentum. Don't brake it; ride it into the next move.
- ConceptLimit plus proximityHold the line and stay close. A boundary lands better with your body in the room.
- ConceptThe lockWhat keeps people from giving love they already have. Usually loyalty, old scripts or pride.
- ConceptLocus of controlWhere you think the outcomes in your life come from, and why owning everything is its own trap.
- ConceptLogosGreek for "word." For Heraclitus, the order running through everything.
- ConceptLove, as a testLove is the best for each person, without attachment, as objectively as we can get.
- ConceptMaking love, as a practiceOffering yourself with full presence. Defined by the quality of attention, not by the act.
- ConceptManA man protects. A man protects the weak and defenseless.
- ConceptMarket density over sizeA small, concentrated group you can actually serve beats a huge, scattered market.
- ConceptMeasurement shapes what you seeHow you measure decides what becomes visible. A new way of measuring can open a new way of making.
- ConceptMenor esfuerzo posibleLiving by the least effort possible. The opposite of how I was raised to work, with its own shadow.
- ConceptMercy through the bladeTelling the truth sharply, as an act of care. Cutting illusions, not people.
- ConceptMinimum idea alignmentA new idea does not need most people to love it. It just needs the opposition to be weaker than it is.
- ConceptThe mirror techniquePointing to the love someone already shows as proof they can extend it somewhere harder.
- ConceptMolochWhen everyone makes a sensible move and together they build something nobody wanted.
- ConceptMoney as speechThe legal idea that limits on political spending are limits on free speech.
- ConceptMoral injuryThe wound of having done, or allowed, something that goes against your own values, even to survive.
- BeliefMy strength is for love and buildingPower and strength are only worth having if they go into loving, building and protecting.
- BeliefMy value is the people I trustWhat I can offer is not only what I know, but the people I know and trust for what I don't.
- ConceptNam-myoho-renge-kyoThe phrase chanted in Nichiren Buddhism: a vow not to give up in the face of difficulty, and to help others not give up.
- ConceptName people, not peoplesWhen holding power accountable, name the specific people and what they did. Never blame a whole people.
- ConceptNeeded, not knownSeeking your worth by being indispensable, instead of letting yourself be known.
- ConceptThe negative blueprintA bad leader still teaches you something precise: do not do that.
- BeliefThe news says that, not how muchThe news can tell you that something happened. It cannot tell you how much of it there is in the world.
- ConceptNo-drama disciplineDiscipline means teaching. Connect with the child first, then redirect.
- ConceptNonviolent communicationObservation, feeling, need, request: a way of speaking that says what is true without attacking.
- ConceptNPCA non-player character: someone running on a script and inertia instead of their own decisions.
- ConceptOasis of quietCreativity needs a protected time and place where the mind can wander.
- ConceptThe observation trapSeeing a pattern clearly does not mean you are outside of it.
- ConceptOff-camera virtueThe love and work you do where nobody sees, which never shows up in anyone's ledger.
- ConceptThe opinion loopholeWhen a lie or a scam escapes scrutiny by calling itself a belief or free speech.
- BeliefPain and suffering are growthMost growth comes through some kind of tearing down and rebuilding.
- ConceptParentificationWhen a child ends up doing a parent's job, for a sibling or for the parent.
- ConceptPatience problem or design problem?Most friction looks like a patience problem when it is actually a design problem.
- ValuePeaceNothing needs fixing right now, and the quiet is enough. I'm still learning to believe it.
- ConceptPerfectionNot the absence of flaws. Finishing an action with attention and integrity.
- ConceptPermission until told otherwise"I have permission until someone tells me I don't." Why waiting for permission is often the real delay.
- ConceptA phrase as a lidSome phrases aren't comfort. They're a lid we put on someone's feelings so we don't have to do the whole thing.
- ConceptPhysics envyThe temptation to force messy human systems into neat, precise formulas.
- ConceptPlain languageWriting so clear that the reader can find what they need, understand it and use it.
- ConceptPlanck knowledge vs. chauffeur knowledgeReal understanding, versus being able to repeat the words.
- ConceptPlayer expressionHow much a game lets you choose your own way to fight, move, look and earn.
- ConceptPlyometricsJump training: load the muscle on the landing and fire it right away.
- ConceptPortalsMoments when you bend so far you break and come out someone else.
- ConceptPost-monetaryA dream I wrote down in 2015: a world that works together for real, without money in the middle.
- ConceptThe power of fundamentalsThe basic techniques and principles everything else is built on. Going back to them fixes more than you would expect.
- ValuePragmatism over prideAt 2 a.m., exploding is the path of least resistance. Helping takes effort.
- ValuePrecisionNot saying "always" when I mean "sometimes."
- ConceptPrediction trapsTaking market forecasts seriously slowly turns careful people into speculators.
- ConceptThe preemptive-humility tellA joke or a put-down of yourself, right when a sincere want becomes visible, so you never have to own it.
- ConceptPremiums on brevityWith so much competing for attention, short wins. But the short version often drops what mattered.
- ValuePresenceGiving the moment in front of me my full attention.
- ConceptProjectionPutting your own feelings and traits onto someone else, in place of what is actually there.
- ConceptThe Prometheus testThree questions for any powerful technology: is it competent, is anyone accountable, did we consent?
- ValueProvisionMaking sure my people are covered. Cooking dinner counts.
- ConceptThe published priceThe number of asks a kid learns it takes before you give in or blow up. They learn it exactly.
- ConceptPunishment-parenting the ideaBeing gentle with your kids and your mistakes, and still making your own ideas earn the right to exist.
- ConceptPure freedomConstraint is not the enemy of flight. It is the air under the wings.
- ConceptPure loveLove without performance, without a trade and without needing to be validated back.
- BeliefQuestions are the root of knowledgeEvery piece of human knowledge started as a question. Without questions there is no progress.
- ConceptQuote launderingHow a line drifts from the person who said it to someone more famous, gaining authority and losing its source.
- ConceptRadical truthSeeing and saying things as they are, without distorting or softening, and still moving with care.
- ConceptThe rant and the meditationTwo real writing voices, the calm aphorism and the profane run-on. The signature is the balance between them.
- ConceptReality assemblyYour sense of where and who you are is built, piece by piece, by the body and the mind together.
- ConceptThe reality distributionWe build our picture of how the world works from a very narrow slice of experience.
- ConceptReality testingChecking what goes on inside you against what is actually happening outside.
- ConceptThe rebel frameThe flattering story where you are the conscious critic of the system and everyone else is asleep inside it.
- ConceptThe receiving blockBeing able to give without limit, and struggling to take care, attention or help that is offered directly.
- ConceptRespect is acknowledgment plus restraintRespect isn't manners or tone of voice. It's seeing someone's needs and limits, and holding back your own preference.
- ValueResponsibilityA title says what I'm called. Responsibility is what I'm counted on for.
- ConceptRest and illuminationTwo ways the body settles. One because it feels safe, one because you briefly left.
- ConceptRevealed vs. endorsed preferenceWhat you actually do versus what you would choose after thinking about it. Apps profit from the gap.
- ConceptRobot modeTotal concentration, perform at all costs. I hate it and I love it.
- ConceptSavage acceptanceMeeting reality exactly where it is, without compromise and without pretending it was meant to be.
- ConceptThe scorekeeperAn automatic moral ledger, learned young, that keeps points on everyone, including whether you have earned your rest.
- ConceptThe second hopScene, then the general idea, then a specific new case. Learning happens on the second jump.
- ConceptSelf-fulfilling prophecyA false belief that changes how people act, until it comes true.
- ConceptSelf-mastery as a luxury goodDiscipline works, but the entry fee was never available to everyone. Self-mastery is partly privilege.
- ConceptSelf-transcendenceThe level Maslow added above self-actualization: finding meaning in serving something bigger than you.
- BeliefA senior leadsSeniority is not rank. It is what you actually bring: action, warmth, strength with restraint.
- ConceptThe sensation checkInstead of telling a kid what is true, ask what they can feel. "Does it feel different?"
- ConceptServant leadershipLeadership aimed at the growth of the people being led, where the cost flows toward the leader.
- ConceptShadowThe parts of yourself you have disowned: aggression, envy, lust, the wish to dominate.
- ConceptShameGuilt is feeling bad about something you did. Shame is feeling bad about who you are.
- ConceptSharper and softerClearer about what you mean, gentler in how you say it. Both at once.
- ConceptThe sheep machineThe infrastructure that processes people like livestock while making them grateful for the experience.
- ConceptSignal sourcesMost of what we know comes from people repeating someone else. Go to the source.
- ConceptSituational depressionA low mood that answers a specific hard event, and usually lifts as the event passes.
- ConceptSlopLow-quality content made in bulk with AI. Merriam-Webster's word of the year for 2025.
- ConceptThe slow hunchMost breakthroughs are not eureka moments. They are hunches you keep alive for years.
- ConceptSmall betsMany small, independent bets survive shocks that would sink one big one.
- ConceptThe Socratic problemWe only know Socrates through Plato. Misunderstanding is the default, even among the brilliant and devoted.
- ConceptSpeed as identityWhen moving fast becomes who you are, every fast delivery raises the bar, and there is never an "enough."
- ConceptSpiritThe non-physical part of me: my emotions and my character. An atheist's use of an old word.
- ConceptSquanderers of human potentialCapable people who waste what they have out of comfort, fear or habit, not ignorance.
- ConceptThe standing tableA weekly check-in with your partner, so the truth comes out at ask number one, while it is still small.
- ConceptStoicism and EpictetusSome things are up to us and some are not. Freedom starts with knowing the difference.
- ConceptStory, incentives, outcomesTo understand a company, look past the story it tells to the incentives it has and the outcomes that pile up downstream.
- ConceptThe supremacist engineNot one bigotry but the move behind all of them: sorting people into worthy and disposable.
- BeliefSystems and proceduresWith systems and procedures, plus willpower, consistency, time and energy, you can do almost anything.
- ConceptThe tariffThe extra cost on top of a hard topic: the ice, the sarcasm, the cold week that follows.
- ConceptTemperanceOne of the four classic virtues: governing your appetites instead of being governed by them.
- Concept"That didn't work, I'm still here"The message under every correction: mistakes do not cost connection.
- ConceptTheodicyThe attempt to explain why a good and all-powerful God would allow evil.
- ConceptThreat compressionUnder sustained pressure, the mind trades nuance for speed and safety: end it decisively, now.
- ConceptTimingWhen you control the pace and order of events, you shape how they unfold.
- ConceptTone vs. standardHow loud you say it, and where the line actually sits. They are separate dials.
- ConceptTotalizing blameCollapsing a messy outcome onto one person, because one villain feels more controllable than many causes.
- ConceptToy modelA small, made-up, complete example you solve fully before touching the messy real case.
- ConceptThe traffic lightA three-step way to handle anger: red, stop. Yellow, think. Green, respond.
- ConceptTraining sensationsEffort, soreness and pain are different signals. None of them, alone, tells you whether tissue is damaged.
- ConceptThe transfer principleLeadership does not disappear when someone opts out. It moves to whoever is left standing.
- ConceptTransmissionThe quality of presence people can feel without anyone explaining it.
- ConceptTwo respect frameworksA generous standard for everyone else, and a harsh one I keep only for myself.
- ConceptThe unknowable futureYou can predict from good explanations. You cannot predict what new knowledge will change.
- ConceptThe unwitnessed selfThe version of you that only exists when nobody else is around.
- ConceptValueHow important something is to you. Your values are the inner reference for what is good.
- ConceptThe Vegeta dynamicStriving that only knows how to move when there is a rival to beat, even an imaginary one.
- ConceptVelocity lossThe distress of suddenly losing your speed, your agency and your ability to act on your own.
- ConceptWarrior leadershipA small code for leading with strength and care at the same time.
- ConceptThe weather-maker selling umbrellasAsk whether the person who causes an outcome profits from who learns about it first.
- ConceptWhat breath uncoversSlow, continuous breathing can reveal where you are holding tension you did not know about.
- BeliefWhat I wanted was companionshipSometimes what we call a search for love is a simpler, older need: someone beside us.
- ConceptWhat sort of life to want"Do whatever pleases you" does not help, because what pleases you depends on what life you think is good.
- ConceptWhole adultA whole adult owns what they did not cause.
- ConceptWitnessTo witness someone is to perceive them and hold what you perceived. Both parts are required.
- ConceptWorrying before the wheel startsDo your worrying before the decision. Once the wheel is spinning, relax and execute.
- ConceptWorth is not usefulnessA truly developed world would not make people earn the right to be treated with dignity.
- ConceptYHLQMDLG"Yo hago lo que me da la gana": I do whatever I want. My operating principle for forty years, until it met its limit.
- ConceptYou don't have to apologize"You don't have to say sorry, just stop." A parenting phrase that favors the change over the ritual.
Concepts
252 entriesIdeas that help explain how people and things work.
Browse allValues
20 entriesWhat I choose to live by, and what that looks like on an ordinary day.
Beliefs
17 entriesThings I hold to be true, written so anyone could hold them too.