What it is
The mirror technique is a reframe. Instead of arguing that someone could be more loving toward a difficult person, you point to the love they already show, to you, to their kids, to a friend, and hold it up like a mirror: “You already know how to do this. I’ve seen you do it.”
It works because it skips the debate about potential and points straight at behavior.
How it shows up for me
I’ve used it with people in my family who were stuck in old feuds. “Look how you treat me. Could you give that to him?” It doesn’t always work. When it does, it’s beautiful to watch.