What it is
Compensation is a behavior you developed to get through something hard: being funny so nobody hits you, being useful so nobody leaves. Choice is picking a behavior from a settled place, because it fits, not because you’d be in danger without it.
From the outside they can look identical. From the inside, compensation feels like you don’t have another option.
How it shows up for me
I can be generous because I want to, or generous because I’m afraid of what happens if I’m not. The act is the same. The second one wears me out. Noticing which one is running is half the work.